Death

There is no better time than today that I wanted to die.

My life is not worth living.

I'm probably leading one of the most miserable lives in my age group.

This is meant to be my post HSC holiday, but I feel more depressed and less festive than ever.

I am holding (and will for the rest of my life) one of the biggest mistakes I've made in my life. And I'm having difficulties trying to at least make it better. (unsuccessfully)

I'm on drugs.

I've lost all confidence, self esteem and possible potential I would have in anything in my future. I'm living my life right now mainly because I have no choice (if i kill myself, my mum is gonna get pissed at me, and Ji hasn't got a gf yet)

Everyday has been a struggle to me. HSC or no HSC, I'm just dragging myself every day.

Despite many attempts to be 'positive' and 'happy',
1) I have absolutely no reason to be happy/positive.
2) Faking it ain't my kinda thing
3) WTF?

I fear that my anxiety disorder is not gonna be cured. Over such petty little problems. How could Jackson let petty little things like that get to him. My doctor told me of people who are constantly on prozac... I don't want to live life that way =(

What's wrong with me?

... i'm watching TV